Wednesday, September 1, 2010

The Insignificant Teenager

This was the most important weekend of my brother’s life. On the next evening, he would be pronounced the proud husband of his bride. Although this weekend was theirs, for that one night, all I can think about is how I presented myself. That night, I had to deliver a speech to the bridal party.

Of course, I had drilled this speech into my head. I could more than likely recite it to this day. My fear was that I may become more realized then I intended. That I may remembered as the boy who completely missed the intended message. All I wanted was to recite my words of kindness, and then to disappear to my chair.
I entered the dining room that was to be full in due time, only thinking about the task at hand. I could not enjoy this time of fake happiness, as I knew that everyone else felt sick about giving their own speech. I could see right through their smiles and tell that they felt just like I did inside.

The best man kicked off the speeches with a very well composed slide show and a very touching theme. After his conclusion, we proceeded to go onto the next anxiety filled speaker. I cannot recall who the speaker was because I knew my time was short. In fact, all the rest of the speeches seem to be a blur, as I can only remember reciting those words over and over in my head.

A group of three stood up as one to congratulate the soon to be weds, as I could see clearly that none of them felt capable of delivering a speech alone. This seemed like quite the unfair advantage. My time was indeed very short at this point, as the trio proceeded to retire from the podium. I quickly made one last effort to stall, as I ran for the bathroom. I thought that maybe I could drill the thoughts into my head just a little more during this very brief time period.

Much to my chagrin, I returned to the dining room with all eyes on me. Everyone knew I was the last one to speak. I am sure that they all expected me, the youngest of all the speakers, to have the extreme cliché speech that they had all heard before. I knew this and specifically strayed away from the typical speech. I just hoped that I could deliver it as I had planned. No one had heard my speech to this point. I had not practiced in front of a single soul. This meant that I had no idea whether these jokes would be as funny to the audience as they were to me and my brain.

I walked to the front of the room, catching everyone’s attention. On cue, my sister stood up and gave me a beat as I threw out a rap for my confused and maybe concerned listeners. I had decided this was the best method of getting their attention and hopefully convincing them that I was not going to be scared out of my wits as others my age would be, even though I truly was. As I finished this very quick rap, I gazed upon the many puzzled faces that were looking right back at me. I informed them that this rap had absolutely nothing to do with my speech, but instead, was in my opinion, a good way to introduce the youngest of the children.

My speech flowed as I had wanted from this point forward. The laughter was a good sign to me that I was in fact catching their interest and that I was not the only one who thought I was humorous. I closed my speech and my heart began to return to its normal rate. As I took my seat, I realized that I may not have accomplished what I had wanted. That I may not have been able to go unnoticed, but instead, I had been able to seize the small moment in this weekend that I had and that I had in fact not gone disregarded as the insignificant teenager.

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